IL. Lake Effect

The 2006 World Wide Competition

2005-11-21T16:54:00.000-06:00

As of today, we are over the half way mark of our tour.The 2006 World Wide Competition is a week old now with Nine Members picked thusfar. Today Monday, is a day off. We are in Fayatteville NC. by the way. We'll spend Thanksgiving in SC somewhere near Shaw AFB. I have been doing more driving now for this short strech while we await a more permanent person(s). Its very therapeutic to drive our tour bus. It looks nice on me. LOL. So, I now, literally, drive the team/show: both figuratively and musically as the drummer. Who would've thought!

Any how....this is where X can add her 3 cents/comments.lol if she so desires. I would be dissapointed if she didn't. Hah!......."Luv her like a "play sista"...

X says: *tapping mic* AHEM... AHEM umm... yes, well... umm... I just want to say when you bring it to THE A (my new terminology) LOL let me know, and please remind me, because I will be all up in the front row. I wish I could see the rejects!!! Wooo some of them must be funny like the damn American Idol outtakes!!! LOL =)))

Progress must be Made!

2005-03-21T22:10:00.000-06:00

Ok! Peoples......Phareal, tho'. This time. This is the last time you'll hear me. I'm out now.....the last time to cheer me. Its been love, mos def. Life, love and the pursuit of Happiness. It is...what it is.

Henceforth, I. again, invite you to "comegowithme" to the new Joint and take a view through "My World". I'll even help you out:http://bro_numsi.typepad.com/bobbys_world/

Take care of yourself and each other......TIB' O5...... "We Bleed Blue, Indeed"

Still Here!

2005-03-03T14:16:00.000-06:00

Naw, I haven't left completely, yet. Got so much happenin' right about now. Some things I can't control. Still doing some tweekin' at the new site. Yet, its "bloggable", nonetheless. You know how we gotta be diff. and*ish. About to do some PT with my "Fire Dawgs" and let out some unnecessary aggression. Gotta go! I'll Holla.

Back to where it all started::

2005-03-01T21:10:00.000-06:00

Date: 05 Feb 02
Place: Lackland AFB San Antonio, Texas
Event: Basic Training(Boot Camp)

Update

Date:06 Mar 05
Place: Lackland AFB San Antonio, Texas
Event: World Wide Talent Competition("Tops In Blue")

The Deal

They say that most things revolve in cycles. Kinda like karma. Who the "F**k is "They"! When I decided to stepp out of my comfort and "Cross over into the Blue", didn't think I would ever want to come back or even fatham the thought of visiting this City ever again. Who knew!
Under different circumstances, now I see, as in A Dream.

"A Thinker who dreams it; then makes it a reality!"........Coming sooner than ya think, "MY WORLD".

.....stay tuned.

One.:

THIS JUST IN>>>>>>>>>>>"BLOG UPDATE>>>>>>>>>>>>>>BLOG UPDATE>>>>>>>>BLOG UPDATE!

"MY WORLD" IS NOW UP AND FUNCTIONABLE......STILL TWEEKIN IT A BIT.
CONSEQUENTLY, COPY AND PASTE IS IN FULL EFFECT........COPY THAT!

PEACE AND MO' BLESSINGS..........SEE YA WHEN I SEE YA1

Gettin' There.

2005-03-01T09:25:00.000-06:00

Just felt like sharing some of Life's Aquarium today.

Real Quick. Back while just entering college, this cat that I met while there, dropped this on me....

Thought of the Week: "Its O.K. to be confident and a lil' cocky even, But Do Remeber This..... There will always be atleast seven.."

Seven random people who:

1. Have not "arrived" to where you are. Or are worst than you.
2. Are presently at where you "think" you are as well. Or can do the same "damn thing" you can do.
3. Have Been there, done that and got the damn T-shirt. Or are just straight up "better than you".
4. Actually wrote the book you just got done readin'. Or are just "gifted" in the literal sense.

Remember there's will always be Seven.

What you So Mad At, Now!!!! Part 2

2005-02-25T17:19:00.000-06:00

....Ponder this. Just got the night off from my 24hr. shift and only worked 1 day and a half, all week, which was Wednesday and today. Next week, I leave Sun. and fly out to San Antonio for 10 days for the "Audition". I work this Sunday, however, its a "down" day for us, so basically, we do "whatever" all day.

Long story short. " Ask not what you can do for your country, but rather, what your country can do for you!"

Rhaps., I see ya, baby girl. Grayse. Happy Borne-On Date.

Once, again. I'm Up......Good weekend!

"Uncle Bobby"

2005-02-24T10:00:00.000-06:00

22643264B
Originally uploaded by bro_numsi.

Just doing a first time trial thingamajig'.

Me and my neice, Emani, in 03' while on leave from the desert. She's a little "bigger" now and way too smart for a 4 year old...

Spittin' image of my sister. Wwoooowwww!!!!!

Reverance and Respect.

2005-02-23T17:48:00.000-06:00

*Disclaimer* Again, "These are my opinions; which makes them.....the right ones!" If you are gonna sample somebody or call your self doin' a remake/paying "homage" of a "Legend", Come correct or otherwise, "Stepp!"

If you aren't yet hip to this jazz thing, in particular, Coltrane's "A Love Supreme", peep Brandford Marsalis' version "Live in Amsterdam" for a start and tell me he didn't study up on that sh*t; he mos def, DID HIS HOMEWORK. Brandford is no punk, by any means; coming from the infamous Marsalis Family including brothers Wynton and Jason.

The current DVD/CD dub. release includes footage including an interview with Alice Coltrane, herself and with the session musicians involved in the works of the project; Jeff "Tain" Watts included.

I'm not even doin' justice to it; trying to talk about it! Just peep whenever you feel its necessary. A most have. Of course, do your homework, first. For maximum appreciation.

I'll even help get you started: "A Love Supreme"- Original Take

Therapeutic Work!........ What A Concept!

2005-02-22T14:38:00.000-06:00

This is the last day of the 5-day fiasco for Myself. It all ends tomorrow. Hope all had a good threeday Vacay. For those of you who didn't; Don't know what ta tell ya! (Rhaps, you still got to see X, nonetheless). LOL

Drove up to ATL. to see my God-brother and paartner's new recording studio and to just chill, but ended up getting put to work the whole tyme I'm there, pretty much. WTF! It was All Relative, just the same. However. Sound Engineering can get real technical at times with the language and jargon; thus unless your a musician of some sort, it can get "way over the top". Like anotha' language. He's on this whole "other", not "another" level. I "think" I know what I'm doing???

Lessons and information well learned, yet still. On Sat., We run into former Mayor Andrew Young, while at the Barber Shop. I would've missed him if my GB didn't get my attention away from the ALL-STAR highlights. "He's very well articulated"; .....but why would'nt he be, though? Hello!?! My GB has only been in ATL. for 5 years now. He relocated do to the JOB. True, still, he (Young) has a since of humor as well and isn't "puffed up" with status like some would think. Asking who had next, he points to me, looking headward, *pat on the back, shaking hand in the process*. He got jokes......cool!

Also, found some good "muzak" that I would'nt have found here in Panama City. "the Worst" when it comes to music stores, period. WoW! Its sad, really!

All in all, a productive break from the norm., if that makes sense.

Meanwhile, check the "meeting of the minds, "NY Style", if you haven't already, via Singing or Yolie or whomever has coverage. Good Times.

What you So Mad At, Now!!!!

2005-02-18T14:46:00.000-06:00

Its Friday. I'm happy. Yet, I feel not liking bloggin' today. The fact that I have the next 5days to clown has nothing to with it, either. Really. *cheesin', as I type this*.

A-aight.....I'm Up. Good Weekend!

You. Are. Not. Ready! - Yet......Props

2005-02-16T05:26:00.000-06:00

I, Really, need a blog makeover. Its now due, really.Growing up as a musician/"artsy fartsy cat", somethings ya just know, like the back of ya hand. Other things just take time. I still consider myself a youngin' in this blogworld. And. After peepin, "lurkin" and conversin' with the likes of fellow music passionates Honey, and Fresh, among others, its evident how much potential there is and scary as to how much "damage" I could actually do here.

Amongst others who share the same love for it, if ya call ya self lovin' music or this blog thang and haven't peeped atleast one of these cats spot; You Trippin' and should stop through! Really, some great info. there.

Let the rebuilding commence?!?..... we'll see.

Rumor has it!...........

2005-02-15T11:17:00.000-06:00

You know the one I'm Talkin Bout'? The mass email from Microsoft and Bill Gates that ya peoples send you saying that if you forward to so many people, you'll get paid? Or the one about Starbucks refusing to help out a group of deployed Marines stationed in Iraq? Or when Gang members drive with the headlights out, then kill anybody who flashes them. Or the one about......Insert yours Here!..........

Ever wonder if there was any truth at all to em'. Go to this site and type in a subject title to find out. Thank me, later. Have fun.

Love, Rain Down- Literally.

2005-02-14T05:16:00.000-06:00

The Remix featuring Mos DeF!- My sh*t!

Seriously, it is raining this morning in the "not so sunny" Sunshine State. Hard, too!.......Might as well be back home. I'm off today, nonetheless and really wasn't feeling the blog for some reason or anotha, yadida, yadida, etc.

But anyways.....

I decided to revert back to a kinda "Oldie but Goodie" post appropriate for today, being V-day and all! I'm sure you'll appreciate this, just the same.

"Happy Valentines Day. Er'day's the 14th!"

"You can get wit' this or You can get with that.......!"

2005-02-11T10:29:00.000-06:00

Man, I tried to wait and hold my peace, but to no avail(e)........Release!!!!!!!!!!

Tha Hell ever happened to "Black Sheep", anyways? Where are they, Now? Frickin' "One Hit Fothermuckas". How come the people you really like make one, two, three albums tops; and the ones you wish woulda stayed undiscovered keep gettin' frickin air time! WTF!

You know where I'm going wit dis!.......

Category 1: Artists you wish would stop trippin and come wit' anotha album, soon!
Category 2: Artists who need to just "stop trippin".
Category 3: Artists who have "gone on" that you wish would stay "Gone"!
Category 4: "New Artist" who, when you hear em', U swear, sound like somebody you already know!
Category 5: Artists you wish you would've "Tried before you Pryed" open that jewel case!

Spare No Dirty Details! If you feel the way I do bout' Muzak........... Do ya thang!

Guess I should set it off, first huh?
Cat 1: Bilal, D'Angelo(he got issues right now, pray for him) A Tribe Called Quest(got me goin' through withdrawal and *ish, shakin' nervously*, Mint Condition(my dogs; why ya doin this to me, Why?)
Cat2: L-boogie: Still waitiin' on that Fugees reunion album. See what happens when you marry a Marley!Whitney and R. Kelly: Three words.....Pray fo' em.
Cat3: 2Pac, Twopoc,toopack.......Did I say 2Pac?
Cat4: Van Hunt(sounds like a young Lenny Kravitz)
Cat5: Mario Winans(some bullsh*t)

I'm In....Stand by!(Part 1)

2005-02-10T18:46:00.000-06:00

Today is a blessed day!

Not just a good day... Today is my break day. Just was notified on yesterday, via phone call late morning, by the head of Air Force Entertainment Headquarters , while working, that they would like "yours truly", for 10 days, to come and audition for them, all expenses paid, for the opp. of, eventually, touring with them for the next year, Worldwide. Did I mention that it was all expenses paid? ....And they say that there is no God.... Oh yeah, I work tomorrow, then go back to work on Tues. and Thurs. to then, have 5 more break days. ( I normally work a 24hr.on/24hr. off schedule.) No weekends! No Holidays! Don't Ask, please!

Long story short, If all goes well, after you audition and are chosen, the tour starts the latter part of March/April and concludes around the same time next year, covering every major AF Base Worldwide, along with other venues that may sponsor them, e.i. universities, colleges, sporting events, ambassadors, dignitaries, etc. (Marg, does this help at all, with your Quest.?)

So dagg! Wait! This means I may actually miss my first residential "Spring Break"in FL this year! And my first summer here, too! *pause, moment of silence*. Ah, Oh Well!

I'll keep you updated as it becomes readily available. Copy that!

Todays trivia: Who will the Fighting ILLINI loose their first game to, if they loose?

Reflection Eternal

2005-02-05T11:33:00.000-06:00

Ok......We're back! Lets settle. This, I know, is kinda overdue. However, feel me just the same on this one. Appreciate this love from my blogfam.

Just some "FYI - in case you were wondering" type stuff regarding myself. Ok, call it a "100 things" list, maybe.....

1. I am the baby of the family and the only boy. No, I was not spoiled, growing up.
2. I have two older sisters, 3 and 8 years apart from me.
3. Plus A host of other "big" sisters and brothers
4. Thus, the high appreciation for the sexier being.(see this post)
5. I've always been somebody's lil' brother until recently.
6. My Mom is from Omaha, Nebraska
7. My Dad is from Utica, Mississippi
8. They met each other in Illinois, go figure.
9. Been married for 40years.
10. I'm still workin on the "married" part.
11. I'm musically inclined via mothers blood.
12. I can appear or sound "country" do to fathers blood.
13. He is the youngest of seven brothers.
14. All, with the exception of one, are still alive.
15. I wish I had aleast one older brother.
16. My parents taught me mostly everything, pretty much.
17. Dad Is a pool shark, but "just plays for relaxation".
18. He and friends play every Friday night at the house and have for the last 3 or 4 years, now.
19. Yes, I have overcome him. I think I was 14 when it first happened.
20. We both have our "Jordan" moments.
21. He met Ernie Banks at a local grocery while endorsing "Ballpark Frank Hotdogs", looooong time ago.
22. Is suppose to retire this year; however, is still comtemplating it.
23. While in H.S., I stayed 5'1" for it seemed like eternity.
24. My wrestlin' coach (Coach B) took a likin' to it.
25. But I managed to get to a mere and present 5'7"(aaight....Yolie)
26. I started going bald my junior year in H. S.
27. No, its not hereditary.
28. I stuck with it totally, due to major compliments from my other "big sisters".
29. My mother is a "Delta"
30. My father is a Mason
31. My oldest sister is a AKA, go figure..........
32. My Brother IN LAw is a Alpha.
33. I am NOT greek, but have past over Greece in route to "The Desert"
34. My first musical "paying" gig was at age 14 at the Jazz Bulls in Lincoln Park.
35. I, technically, didn't belong there.
36. The club no longer exists.
37. I started playing piano at six.......hated it.
38. I started playing drums/perc. at six and a half....... been groovin' ever since.
39.My Mom says that at age 3 while sitting in church on her lap, that I would rock in "perfect time" with the music......
40. * shruggin shoulders* ......I guess.
41. I have met some of my inspirations including Sheila E.
42. Couldn't talk just like a lil' kid when I did. I was 19.
43. She looks taller on television!
44. I Wish I would've did the first one(piano) a little longer, now.
45. I am the introvert to a T. I think I get it from my father.
46. When the extrovert comes out, its definitely, mom.
47. I love My City.
48. I also love Atlanta and New York.
49. I was offered a "partial" scholarship to the New School in New York.
50. What about the other frickin "three Years"?
51. This was about 9 years ago.
52. Still love NY, though.
53. Currently reside in Callaway(8miles from Panama City) Florida.
54. HTF! did I get here? Its aaight. I'm serious, though.
55. They tell me to wait til' "Spring Break" gets Here.......yeah, I know!!!
56. I normally don't cuss. But, I'ma "Grown Ass Man, Dog!!!
57. I not really into video games except for Madden and NBA Live.
58. I am a DOD"Fire Dawg".
59. Currently Been In the Air Force for 3years, today.
60. Joined because I was honestly curious, yet smart enough to know who Not to join.
61. Yet, we're all ONE team. Yuma Devil Dogs 02' 03', Kuwait City'. Whooo-ahhh!
62. Semper Fi- No better Friend. No Worser Enemy! Copy That!
63. Of the three years, been deployed 1year total.
64. I am already a 2x war veteran.
65. I have shot at individuals
66. I have been shot at.
67. Not at liberty to discuss it in detail.
68. Didn't need to join the service for that.
69. Could've stayed at the house for dat.
70. Have one year of enlistment left.
71. Do I have any regrets, Hell No! "Life, Love, and the pursuit of Happiness! It is, what it is!"
72. Would I do it all again, the desert that is, Hell yeah!

Have more but'll save it for another time. Any questions, concerns, gripes, moans, etc., feel free............. Hit me!

Currently and Permanently in the top 10 vibes list: "Donald Lawrence - "I Speak Life", and Tye Tribett and GA, "Life"

Disclaimer:"I Think people who are satisfied with staying within their "comfort zone" and not taking risks suck; and eventually, need to get out of da house, state, country, etc. Whatever....just get the hell out!" My badd.... Thinking aloud, again!

Peace and Mo' Blessings! - Thinking Aloud

2005-02-01T18:40:00.000-06:00

Whazzit Ms. Erykah "On and On" Wright from Texas who made this whole moniker hip to spit? Or did we speak it cuz' it sounds good and pc!?! If we actually heeded those very words. Would we be where we are at this very moment or perhaps, "better off"? Maybe we are suppose to be at where we are for specific reasons. Mo' Blessings indeed would make it Mo' Betta'. So, are you or have you not been blessed thus far? "Why is he preachin?" u ask? On the contrary, just merely thinking aloud.

Sometimes......

I have this "jazz" philosophy on life. Meaning, just play the head,(keep it simple) state the bridge, and when its your turn to solo, vamp until you can't play no mo'. Whatever happens, happens!

Other times, I wish I had the Yellowjackets gig.

I think ,if I were the extrovert that comes out every so often, all the time, I'd have alot more regrets but I'd feel at peace, though.

I wonder, had I listen to my first mind, everytime, Damn!...... I'd be even more unsatisfied and wanting more.

If I were "famous", how arrogant I'd want to be, but couldn't.

I were famous, just to prove that arrogance is bliss and you can be famous and still hang with common folk.

I wish God would speak a little louder....

I think Oprah needs to just send out random "Thank you for makin' me who I am, today" checks.

Just once a month, you could have your cake and eat it, too.

You just wanna see some people who you know are wrong, "get theres". I ain't the only one!

I actually dream my life before it happens, but still find a way to mess it up. Cuz of not listening to Him.

I wonder whatever happen to the most gorgeous woman I've never met, Lorena Turner of Gilbert, Arizona.

But for now.......... I'll keep on dreamin'.

Its Gotta End Now!.....ok, maybe next week.

2005-01-31T05:14:00.000-06:00

Yes, I am claiming the title as the reigning undisputed "Procrastinator of the World". Yes, there a bunch of yall calling Don King for Title Shots as we speak. Some of which have even lost the title on numerous occasions. But this, however would be a good thing, though.

You would think, after coming up with this nice "Refusal List" for 2005* may need to check archives of last month for this one*, one would heed his own words!.....yeah, right. That would be too much "like right" then I would take credit for it instead of giving credit to whom all honour is do!

Is it because I thrive on proving myself underpressure because some of my best work has been borne as a result. Or do I have a serious issue?

Well, nonetheless, this week marks the week for me to either "Put Up" or "Shut Up". Whether or not four years of defense is enough or rather continue and use the gov't for my personal endeavors as much as possible. I already know what the answer is. Just needed to blog about it and refocus. Yall know how we get distracted and all.......

FYI: Working on a nice tribute to "Women who wear Short Hair and Well", so if you are one that meets the following, once did or know of any potentials, Back @ Me. Pics. of course, are very necessary and any history/info. as to how the current style came about would be greatly appreciated .Conseqeuntly, Color is not a issue, this time. "Its All Relative, But Its Not Negative"......

No..... I don't look like John Singleton.

2005-01-28T18:42:00.000-06:00

I guess this is suppose to be a compliment when people tell me this. Rather, it surprises me when those of the caucasian persuasion say it or maybe its that they even know who John Singleton is. As far as they're concerned, we all look alike.... Specially the bald ones!

Or when "they" say, "Haven't I seen you in a movie or somethin?" Or " You look like.....somebody!"

How bout'...No. You haven't seen me before. I'm an original, sorry. So shut your mouth and keep any further comments amongst yourselves, "Pink toes" and "Wheat people".

Its a inside "diva" joke..

Good Weekend!

I have been summoned! Not by the govt............

2005-01-28T17:06:00.000-06:00

This *ish* has got to stop! Really. Only Cuz' I love the diva like that and cuz of her Windy City ties....... I'm trippin, yall.

First, List your Random

I'm Too Much - Chubb Rock
Your Body is A Wonderland - John Mayer
Reminisce-Bilal
Balanced - Mums
Bonnita Applebum - A Tribe Called Quest
Praise Belongs to You - Fred Hammond
Sex, Love, and Money - Mos Def
Violent - 2Pac
Jesus Walks - Kanye West
Warm Up - Jill Scott

What is the total amount of music files on your computer(iPod)? Hell if I know. I still have like the 12" LPs, go figure.

The last CD you bought is: Rashaan Patterson's latest(title forthcoming)

What is the song you last listened to before this message? Love Song for No - John Mayer

Write down five songs you often listen to or that mean alot to you:1. Loved on Me - Fred Hammond 2. Back to You - John Mayer 3. Balanced - Mums 4. Perfect Time - Sheila E. and E Train 5. Rhythm of Love - Anita Baker
Who are you gonna pass this stick to? Nathan, Knowone, Nada

Part 2, continued as to "Why.......?"

2005-01-26T11:17:00.000-06:00

.... Man, who wants to be sick, honestly?......Anyhow, now that the drugs have worn off and down their work, I can now continue mine(see part 1). And as promised (a few days late, I know) I give you some of my reasons "Why I Love these Black Women".

Big Momma, Momma, Patrice, Entoile, Yasminn, Elise, L-boogie, India, Angela, Lisa, Pamela, Renee, Nikki, Kim, Anita, Donnita...Insert Your Name Here!...........this is fa' you!

Due to space and how the pupils tend to constrict afterwhile, I'll get to the major points at hand. Again, these are my opinions, which, makes them, the right ones......Here we go....

...Why ask "Why"? "Why in the hell not?"

....My father found my mother. Together, with His help, they had me, the last born and the only boy: enough said.

....If I don't, "somebody" else will.

....."There is nothing wrong with the way you are!"

...."For all the reasons "they" don't.

...."Like Jazz, the world would suck without some color thrown into the mix".

....." I swear, somma dem frangrances yall wear smell damn near edible!" God!

...."Cuz' blondes are sooooooo overrated!"

...."like coffee, yall come in many different flavors.

...."Nobody knows "Us" better....

...."Constantly Imitated, Never Duplicated, Under appreciated"

...."No matter what you try and mix or put with it, Chocolate still stands out!"

....."Whether you add 3cremes and 2sugar or take it straight....Java is Java, baby"

.... "The Walk...... Oh my God!, the walk.......*need a sec. to gather composure*, shakes aggressively....*

...."You never hear hardly any brown/brunette jokes or of having a "brunette or black" moment, do you?"

....."You don't have to take your clothes off and wear almost nothing......to be sexy.....We can use our imagination, just fine.

.... "Sometimes imagining isn't necessary. Yall just "blessed"!

...."Sometimes attitude IS necessary.."

...."Foxy "Brown" just sounds a lot better, don't it?"

...."when "they" are forced to start designing clothes with yall in mind, specifically, WOW!

Really I could continue this however......... for now, the last.......

...."All it takes is One look and One time".... you'll get this one on the way Home..

Why Bro_Numsi loves Black Women (part 1)

2005-01-22T07:44:00.000-06:00

If you are an intellectual like myself or an avid reader just the same , then you are probably familiar with author, writer and ordained minister Michael Eric Dyson and his best seller," Why I Love Black Women". If you reside in the Windy City area, then, you may be fortunate to either have met him or know him personally. His book has been praised by Ebony, Essence and Jet and dubbed, "the Valentine to the black women". In a nutshell, everything that I have felt towards any black woman from my mother, sisters, aunties, etc. and even my fellow female bloggers that we frequent on the daily, He says it or covers it, one way or another.

In resurrecting this book for a" second" time, due to my recent born date, I, once again have the opportunity of giving my very own reasons, with his inspiration, of why bro_numsi loves the black woman.

Don't get it twisted; I love them all. Women in general. No discrimination in the least. However, being a bruh' raised by sistas...... need I say more. One Feels the Need, every now and again, to show some verbal appreciation as well just so we know:" they can tan and burn themselves all they want and get injected, implanted as well, but at the end of the day, they'll never come close to my sista')Hence, the "extra" Love. These are merely my opinions; yet, they are mine, which makes them, the right ones. Whether you agree or not, is all relative. I hope you DON'T agree with me. You're just helping me prove the point, just the same....

Upon, completion of the book(by mon. hopefully) I'll post my reasons "Why"(part 2). Those of you who have the head start ( you know who you are) stand by, please and wait! I'm a lil' slow when it comes to this blog code stuff. (Danke shon, gra.yse)

Ms. X, Sangin' Chick, and Elle(get well soon, you sounded terrible!) will appreciate this one.

Until then...... Gotta country to defend and a book to finish.

Copy that.

Back to the Grill, Again

2005-01-14T13:50:00.000-06:00

... Made it back, safely yall, to the Sunshine state. Kinda missed the cold weather though. Was startin' to get soft'. One thing is fa sho'..... bro_numsi will not be making anotha trip back home to Chi. anytimes soon, or in the near future, unless absolutely nec. 12+ hours......Not what its about, at all.

....Anyhow, lots of decisions to make within the next month. So, I'll be a busy one. Tryin' to stay focused, man. Now that I'm actually back in the good Ol' U.S. and in a beautiful state, gotta take advantage of every oppurtunity. Wheather or not, I feel like it or not. Gotta do whats best for Wash'. Reverted to the "Refusal List", again.

So if ya feelin me, "Comegowithme!"...............

P.S. ......Somebody help a brudah out wit' postin' a pic, as to end all the speculation! TY in advance. Copy that.

Chi-Town United: Meeting of Minds (pt.1)

2005-01-10T10:29:00.000-06:00

..yall ever wonder what the people we blog/chat with on thee reg. would really be like in person? Whether or not its all a "front" ? Better yet, recall Sunnchines "Nice to meet You" blog before Christmas, last month, recalling bloggers that she frequents.

...Copy That. Been there and Done that!

The Set Up

After a few last minute emails and "phone tag" minus some responses(Sivad and co.) and 10+ hours of driving from Phareal(Philly) and Myself(Florida), Things were finally, good to go.

The Place

Dave and Busters. A good neutral location for such a event. I, naturally, am running late, do to unforseen relatives who want to "see You". Not making excuses, though. I arrive to find, of course, no decent parking anywhere in site. So, last resort, "valet". They "got me" for 12 bucks, so, best believe, a Bruh was in full "militant" mode on the vehicle inspection.

The Encounter

Not having been @ D and B's for a grip, I'm late and locating the subjects wasn't that easy. But to any event, mission accomplished. Rapheal: Mr. Cool Cat, "Artsy Fartsy" EduTainment Brother. This is all Good and Relative, me being the same similiar Cat, as well. Chevonne: Ms. Sunshine, classy and Ed., just the same, 5000 watt smile and all.

Long story short, really, there aren't many details, meeting of the minds are always cool to me in the fact, that you discover what you do have in common, being past high school expo. to Athletes to music, rather than what you don't have in common. "Its All Relative, but its Not Negative". All in all, the start to new possible Friendships.

Perhaps, part Deux(thats "two") will include more participants(hint:), just the same. Who knows, maybe a movie/film could develop as a results. Phareal could do production, Myself with the soundtrack and Chevonne could finance/market it........

I'm trippin'...... Safe journey prayers as Myself(Florida) and Phareal(Philly) travel back to our respective states, to find er'thing "decent and in Order".

*Disclaimer: the above mention event was merely coincidential by locale and not pre-meditated/planned in any shape, form or fashion*.........although not discouraging future ideas!

Copy that!

Ordering Pizza In 2008- One Nation: Under Survelliance

2005-01-06T10:35:00.000-06:00

Ok, I given you a remedy for happiness for 2005 with the Refusal List and extended to you the Invitation. Now, I'ma hitcha with some reality for that @$$: just a little something to make ya say, hmmm.

I received this email from a friend/blogger of mine. Some of you may have gotten this one as well. She refused to reply to the sender of it due to research that she was conducting on a similiar topic and how the trueism/actuality of it happening, "got to her". Because of the nature of my job and employer, it just all seemed relative to me as being quite possible, in the near future.

Let me know your thoughts on this topic. ......Its kinda lengthy, so try to stay with it.

Subject: ORDERING PIZZA IN 2008

Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID
number?
Customer: Hi, I'd like to place an order.
Operator: I must have your NIDN first, sir.
Customer: My National ID Number, yeah, hold on, eh, it's
6102049998-45-54610.
Operator: Thank you Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland
Drive, and the phone number is 494-2366. Your office number over at
Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number is 266-2566. Email
address is sheehan@home.net . Which number are you calling from sir?
Customer: Huh? I'm at home. Where'd you get all this information?
Operator: We're wired into the HSS, sir.
Customer: The HSS, what is that?
Operator: We're wired into the Homeland Security System, sir. This
will
add only 15 seconds to your ordering time.
Customer: (sighs) Oh well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat
Special pizzas.
Operator: I don't think that's a good idea, sir.
Customer: Whaddya mean?
Operator: Sir, your medical records and commode sensors indicate that
you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol.
Your National Health Care provider won't allow such an unhealthy
choice.
Customer: What?!?! What do you
recommend, then?
Operator: You might try our low-fat
Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it.
Customer: What makes you think I'd like something like that?
Operator: Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your
local library last week, sir. That's why I made the suggestion.
Customer: All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones, then.
Operator: That should be plenty for you, your wife and your four kids.
Your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49.99.
Customer: Lem'me give you my credit card number.
Operator: I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash.
Your credit card balance is over its limit.
Customer: I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your
driver
gets here.
Operator: That won't work either, sir. Your checking account is
overdrawn also.
Customer: Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready.
How long will it take?
Operator: We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45
minutes, sir. If you're in a hurry you might want to pick'em up while
you're out getting the cash, but then, carrying pizzas on a motorcycle
can be a little awkward.
Customer: Wait! How do you know I ride a scooter?
Operator: It says here you're in arrears on your car payments, so your
car got repo'ed. But your Harley's paid for and you just filled the
tank yesterday.
Customer: Well, I'll be a #%#^^&$%^$@#
Operator: I'd advise watching your language, sir. You've already got a
July
4, 2003 conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see here in
September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at a judge. Oh yes,
I see here that you just got out from a 90 day stay in the State
Correctional Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return to
society?
Customer: (speechless)
Operator: Will there be anything else, sir?
Customer: Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke.
Operator: I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us
from
offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits this..
Thank you for calling Pizza Hut.
ONE NATION :UNDER SURVEILLANCE

--bro_numsi

The Invitation

2005-01-03T15:37:00.000-06:00

... For the lack of not feeling the blog today, I felt the need to attempt to touch someone and help start their New Year off right.
So, I resulted to an oldie but goodie. Many of you may have seen and very well, may have this peice....
Consequently, I dare not attempt to take credit. To this day, still, this says it all for me, and then some.

Just the same, I give to you all.....

"The Invitation"

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living.
I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.
It doesn't interest me how old you are.
I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.
It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon.
I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow,
if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain!
I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it, or fix it.
I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own,
if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, to be realistic, to remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true.
I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself;
if you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul; if you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.
I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day, and if you can source your own life from its presence.
I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine,
and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, "Yes!"

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have.
I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children.
It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here.
I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me and not shrink back.
It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied.
I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away.
I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and
if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

byOriah Mountain Dreamercopyright © 1999 by Oriah Mountain Dreamer.

2005 "Refusal List

2004-12-29T11:59:00.000-06:00

...yeah, yall don already made ya claims, sayin' how "I'ma do this and I'ma do that next year and Maybe, I'll try or consider such and such....."!

I know watcha thinkin'. Remaining positive bcuz "Its All Relative, right?"

....."Negative, ghostrider! The pattern is Full". We have a God that is bigger than any problems we could ever face.

Therefore, "Refuse to be denied!" I have. Its actually, kinda therapeutic, too.

Here are some examples:

1. I refuse to be denied.
2. Refuse to settle for nothing less than my best.
3. Refuse to put up with Female BS any longer.
4. Refuse to put up with Male BS any longer.
5. Refuse to let BS influence myself in any way, shape, form, or fashion.
6. Refuse to keep around people who aren't headed in your direction.
7. Refuse to get or be upset over things you can't control.
8. Refuse to allow "that person" to push your hot buttons.
9. Refuse to not be happy.
10. Period.
11.

...Feel me, yet?

....Don't just settle for the "jumper". Head fake, Go baseline and dunk on that ass! While your still able to. Go with your first mind and you'll have no regrets. Doubts, maybe but, no regrets.

Which ever applies........... "ATL., I'll see ya in 48hours. Copy that!"

The "Go To"gift!

2004-12-21T11:33:00.000-06:00

........Similiar to your "Go To" guy when needed in the Clutch. A La MJ, Larry Bird, Kobe, T-mac, Isiah etc. You get my point.

Never has IT let me done or others, for that matter. Delivering almost on que. However, appreciated by some, yet, not liked by many. Very near and dear to me and some of you as well. Respected by all and feared by none.
IT spans over decades. Rare indeed, pending on what or who you want to get IT for. Has inspired many to date and many still to come.

Yet ITs not for everyone. Consequently, people that know me aren't surprised and yet,expect nothing less when I do give IT to them.

IT soothes the heart, mind, body and soul. Is known worldwide by all from North America, Europe, to Japan and the Islands. May be similiar to other genres like IT, but has stood the test of time, consistently. Can be given year round as well. Xmas is everyday in my household.

OK......enough agony. What is it? ("No Cobbs"/Biters).*Drum Roll, Please..*

The Jazz Album. Whether vinyl, CD or DVD or Eight track. Miles, Coltrane, Bird, Dizzy, Ella, Sarah, Diane, Brubeck, Corea, Benoit, Sanborn, Wahlum, Marsalis, Benson, Blanchard, Connick, Jr. , Washington, Jr., Ledisi, Reeves, Childs, Redman or DeFrancesco. Sinatra. The list, as we all know, goes on.... Without it, The world would have to suffer with rock, r-n-b, soul, hip hop, only. And, OH!, how that would suck... in the worst way.

So As We tackle the last rush of shoppers and pro-crastinators, remember our Reason for the Season and as always my motto ("IAR"). In Closing,.....

"No matter what....it is with God. He is gracious and merciful.
His way is through love, in which we all are. It is Truly-"A Love Supreme-"

-John Coltrane.

Happy New Year and I'll see ya when I see ya.

"WHen did this all get so complicated?"

2004-12-19T13:41:00.000-06:00

Day 16: EMT EXcelled Course. One week until National Registry Test. -

"Anything worth having is, definitely, worth working for it". At the present time I have been walking around w/ a"Medical Patient Assessment/Management Sheet" memorizing exact steps for intervention for the last 1/2 hour. Pacing back and forth, chanting 2mos. worth of medical jargon as if I've loss my mind. Forget that I've diagnosed myself with short term-memory. Time is slowly of the essence. (If you've been thru Med. School or are a RN, then, you feel me.)

Some FYI: "Starting at age 30, our organ systems lose about 1 percent function each year. This "1% rule" can make it difficult to distinguish between the normal effects of aging and the effects of disease." Chp. 12, "Ongoing Assessment"- Emergency Care.

Why did I have to learn this right now, and this particular moment and time. Is this a syke out?
I believe not.... All the more reason to step up and respond under pressure. Consequently, The End Result, A nationally Certified EMT. Another bullet for the resume, making myself that much more marketable yet, liable. The Atlernative, not making the grade, however having a worldsworth of info. only to be retained for next time,................. if there is to be a next time.

Until then, peep the following lyrics by a great Musical influence, "Sting":

(If I Ever Lose My Faith In You) -Ten Summoner's Tales(1993)

You could say I lost my faith in science and progress

You could say I lost my belief in the holy Church

You could say I lost my sense of direction

You could say all of this and worse but

If I ever lose my faith in you

There'd be nothing left for me to do

Some would say I was a lost man in a lost world

You could say I lost my faith in the people on TV

You could say I'd lost my belief in our politicians

They all seemed like game show hosts to me

If I ever lose my faith in you

There'd be nothing left for me to do

I could be lost inside their lies without a trace

But every time I close my eyes I see your face

I never saw no miracle of science

That didn't go from a blessing to a curse

I never saw no military solution

That didn't always end up as something worse but

Let me say this first

If I ever lose my faith in you

There'd be nothing left for me to do

Sting Trivia: In this song, who is he referring to when he says "You"?

Elles' Frickin" Homework Assignment

2004-12-16T15:24:00.000-06:00

Three names you go by: Rob, Bobby(Family and close cats only), Wash'-short for Washington. Military members usually recognize one another by their last name on their uniform, unless there's another cat with the same last name(TMI, I Know)

Three screennames you have:bro_numsi it the only one. Thats how you start gettin' into mutiple personas' and *ish

Three things you like about yourself: My bald head, thick lips, My "its All Relative" attitude

Three things you hate/dislike about yourself:My procrastination, My lack o/eyebrows, my tendency to constantly look mad or serious

Three parts of your heritage:African American, Cherokee tribe, Slapahoe Tribe.

Three things that scare you: Being single, forever, Tarantulas, not trying hard enough

Three of your everyday essentials: OJ5IN1(orange juice and protein), lip lubricant, T-mobile sidekick

Three things you are wearing right now:Black Jordan anklesox, Ernie Banks throwback, Old Navy Boxers

Three of your favorite bands/artists (at the moment):Yellowjackets(pre-WK), Fred Hammond, Conya Doss

Three of your favorite songs at present:"So What"-Miles Davis(kind of blue), "Balance"-Mums("poet" from the "Oz" HBO series), "Get Ready"-Malik Yusef feat. Carl Thomas

Three new things you want to try in the next 12 months:Touring w/ "Tops In Blue", paying all bills ontime., Meet somebody thats on my level of thinking.

Three things you want in a relationship (love is a given):
Communication, God, Understanding(cuz' "Physics the shit Aint")
Two truths and a lie:
gave up going "On Tour" to join the Air Force
had a Menage A Trois
Shot and aided in the death of an individual

Three physical things about the opposite sex (or same) that appeal to you:
Short hair(if they have it), Lipz, Thighs
Three things you just can't do:
Hit a Women, Drink until Unconscious, Anything Left-handed.
Three of your favorite hobbies:Browsing, Looking for rare music, shooting pool(any takers?)

Three things you want to do really badly right now: Get out of my current career field, Shag Tacorra from ANTM, Drive up to ATL and meet Gra.yse in the flesh.

Three careers you're considering:
Architecture, Music Therapy, Intel.

Three places you want to go on vacation:
Back to Holland, Australia, Japan

Three kids names: for either a boy or girl
Miles, Max(ine or well), Summer(be nice)

Three things you want to do before you die:Marry and have one of each, Fly in a F-16 Fighter Jet, Hug Melyssa Fords' Body, slowly.

Three people who have to take this quiz now or die painfully: (if they haven't already)

sunnchine

soul rendezvous

suezette

"Mainstream Radio! What is Your Problem?"

2004-12-14T15:27:00.000-06:00

Man!!!!!! If I turn on the radio and hear: *in no particluar order* Usher, Beyonce and Her two Girlfriends, Lil' John, Ludacris, Snoop,Mario, etc. "One Mo' Gen",........WTF!?! Do I need to come sit in and DJ for these MFs? I think I need to seriously consider going in Radio/Media Management or get with "Sirius Satelite or somethin' cuz' radio needs help right now. Not that this is anything new because radio has been sucking for years ever since radio stations nationwide were taken over buy single-major parent co. What ever happened to when the DJ actually got to choose what he/she wanted to play based on his/her good taste in music? And not the Typical Top 20/40 Hits? Variety Stations?

Man, How I miss and still love College Radio. No Corporate BS.

Guess thats why we have CDs and Tapes players in the cars, right. Could be worse, though. Could be in another country and not understand what the piss they're talkin' bout. Not that it matters any.
My Second Calling perhaps for future reference.

Didn't really plan on a "Songs that make U Sick" List. But if you must.............

Any Old-schoolers in da house? Currently in Da Car CD Deck: "Loinel Richies" Definitive Collection"......... pick a track. Any track....

Big Ups' 2 The Sistas' (Part 1)

2004-12-12T05:50:00.000-06:00

Ok, now that I'm caught up on the episodes. If ya knew how I feel about short hair and what it does to me, then you know that Eva is workin' it, Big Tyme. Yes. Attitude and all(wit' her young ass). You wouldn't know it though by how she carrys herself! (See thats how yall get us in trouble..)Damn!!!!......Sista girl, Ms.T is "Thick as Hell"! Yeah, they ain't ready for her. But, somebody outha is and they see it because she's a prototype for a Full-figured sexy-ass women.

As for Yaya, if she keeps up with the "tude", her Ego is gonna write a check that her body/face can't cash.

Copy That.

I, the Centaur: Half Man, Half Chicago Bull

2004-12-10T17:20:00.000-06:00

How does it feel? Hold that thought............

Something weird happened today that has never happened to me, before.
(No, Minds out of the gutter;been there, done it) But seriously, for the first time ever in my now 30 years, in almost mid-Dec., I felt my childhood flash before me as a real old-school "Good Humor" ice cream truck, music and all, cruised by my house as if it were mid- summer and 80 degrees. Ok, so I'm off by 10 degrees. But still, Its friggin' Dec. Being from the Chi, this is so, not the norm, if you feel me.

Upon first hearing the all familiar jingle, I thought of the mail lady who had just dropped off mail. But then I thought to myself, "Nawww!, couldn't be her. Then the music gets louder and louder. So I'm like, WTF? So, I run outside like I'm 7- years old again and..... there IT is, makin the corner turn. So, of course I go to my car and grab a dollar in change from the change holder and flag down the elderly caucasian male driving. "What can I get for you today, Sir?" he says. Wow! I'm usually the one calling people, "Sir" and "Ma'am". Notheless,what do I get? A snow cone, of course.

Forget the Fact that I've just joined the infamous 30 and blessed Club. But, what better way to sybolize three decades of God-given life . Moments like this don't just happen everyday, unless you live in Florida or Cali. At the end of the day, this is what its about......

Fellow Sags'..... holla atcha man'.

" Some Good Eatin' " Moments

2004-12-07T11:58:00.000-06:00

Ever look forward to lunch cause' you know you cooked up that bad ass dish last night and didn't finish it all? Or ever go to the break lounge to discover than the vending machine guy has restocked and altered the current slection. You, then find out that there are now Hostess Frosted Honey buns or Dolly Madison "GEMS" now present that weren't before. So, you fractically dig through every pocket*searching wit' da quickness*, looking for any possible change. Then you get excited when, indeed you do have enough, and don't have go ask somebody for some change.

That's really what its all about. Then you prance(like a lil' kid) around eating and savoring, not caring about how many pounds are physically being accumalted. Just that your day has just been made and has took a positive turn and just about nothing from here on out can still your joy.

The "thirty and over" Club

2004-12-05T08:15:00.000-06:00

However you wanna put it; Gimme' some:

1. Thirty-nothing......
2. Quartely-Aged.......
3. The Rebirth of the Cool......Three Decades later.
4. Getting your '" second wind".......
5. Been there, Done that, Got plenty o/t-shirts and gave some away.......
6. Living Ya life like Its Golden.....
7. "I have more insurance that you, bitch!" (as a 16-year-old girl cuts you off and flips you the bird)

Turning 30 is the new 21, and they're partying like it's 1999...

...Living proof that statistics don't mean shit when your life is already pre-determined and planned out. He's only waiting on you to friggin' listen. If statistics meant " a Hill-a Beans", I, along wit one out of every five or 15,ooo other black males would have checked outta here, say, five to seven years ago. Fuck a statistic!

They say that life gets better once you've turned thirty. Well, I'll soon find out, indeed(Dec. 9, Sagittarian inthe house). Gotta love it, though, when people say, "Damn, *pause, then givin' me the "beatbox"*, "nigga pleaz.... You ain't no thirty-years old." Kinda does stroke the ego a bit. I'd post a pic. to let it speak for itself but, still have yet to figure out this piss ass "photo blogger" bs. * cheap cry for help/attention *

Before you turn 30, some magazines suggest that by your 30th birthday, you should have experienced one or all of the following: parachuting, threesomes, living in a foreign country, abseiling, bondage, motorcycling, shagging on your office desk, singing karaoke and lesbian sex. Still questioning that last one......
Others advocate a mortgage, a ring on your finger, a successful career (preferably one that is unlikely to involve any desk-shagging), six weeks paid holiday each year, a profitable pension plan and a snot nose in the near future, if not, already wiping noses.

People used to say that I was always a little 'ahead of my time', and all. Listening and playing jazz by age 11, I wasn't your "typical cat". Was one to learn from others mistakes and not having to "go through It" to know that I didn't want any part of it. Was more the "Observer". My how things change.......

I am unmarried, with no mortgage and certainly no snot nose, "that I know of, atleast". I do, however, have a decent job. I, now, can't imagine a world without computers, cable television or CDs. In this world of instant gratification, kids bounce impatiently while momma/daddy draws money from an ATM or wait for water to boil in the microwave for their beloved Cups-O-Noodles. Although I enjoy all the benefits that technology has provided to society, I still hold a special place in my heart for the things that characterize the decades of my youth, the artifacts only others about my age can appreciate. Copy that?.......

Remember Superfriends?.....Aaight, I'ma stop.

More on "that actual day"........ or after! ....P.S. 30-years and older comments only , But if you must....

"Danke Shon"

2004-11-25T10:32:00.000-06:00

.... Not gonna give you the typical "Thanksgivin' Blog". But, yet, some W.O.W...
Reminding ya that, "Its All Relative, But Its Not Negative...." I'm tryin' to heed my own words, as well.

"Thank You"!-- Two cymple words; yet, some find them difficult to utter. Is it pride or what?

For the Third Year in a row, I find myself spending Today, not with family/friends, but yet with, more or less, people I work with. People I could remotely care less about, instead. Yet, I am thankful to be here, soon-to-be approaching the 30 year mark and being able to walk outside with a t-shirt and shorts on instead of a coat, hat and gloves.

To this point and time, I am currently living out my desires, goals, wishes and have no regrets. There is a plan in store for everyone; whether or not you have discovered it yet, is another. So, If you are wth any type of "family" right now, whether great or minimal, your blessed. 'Specially if you "played a major part in" creating any of them. Dig that! Thank HIM!

So Enjoy and remember that you've always got "Kanye's WorkOut Plan" to put into effect by Monday.

Gotta go check on the pies.... Peace and Blessings!

I

" I'm Focused, Man!"........ One Month later..

2004-11-16T10:42:00.000-06:00

"Time has no arms, cape or wings. But, gee how it flies!"... --- My Father

My, how time brings about a change. I'm @ about 85%, now. Gotten into a groove or routine , now. Found a lil' house w/ 3 beds and 1.5 bath about 10mic. out from base; nothing "high tech" or anything. Just some space to be myself in. Nice area... Won't move in until n. week at the earliest. IAR. Work is coming along.(don't get it twisted; its still work) I'm doing what my job title intels' now. Some of the "security measures" here are way "overrated", I think. Thats military for you. Meanwhile, started an EMT course for national registry(Day 3), which should keep my busy and then some til' the end of the year. For the acryonomically challenged, that would be Emergency Medical Technician. Think "ER".

....still I am not convinced yet with things here, overall. (www.tyndall.af.mil) I'm not a bitter person, really. Just hate transition and losing patience, here and there. Copy that, Cheif 2.

More to come........

"Some S#!*@ that I was feelin'"

2004-11-13T11:33:00.000-06:00

...jus' sittin here irritated as F*^# and almost offpoint, with all this time on hand.... Funny how, you/we gotta get hurt or lose people to realize, what we had with them is what you needed or wanted all along. But instead of listenin' to yo' inner Ike Or Tina, you wanted yo' cake plus anotha' , or you went with lust and flesh instead.

We have arrived in this "microwave society" where instant gratification is at a all time high. Patience has been thrown overboard and stanked to be damned.

When we say that we want this type of individual or that type of individual, but true enough, its not what we really want or rather need. (i.e. when women say they don't want a gentleman because their "too nice" or have some, actually, "sense" or "home-training", but instead, a true ill, thuggish, ruggish, bone-type mutha f^#*@. When indeed, they wouldn't know a gentleman if he came along, stood right in front of em' and slapped the f^@& outta ...... Oh, but then he wouldn't be a gent. now would he, then, but yet, indeed the thug they have been longing for?!?

...Or that respect for women and family core values represents weakness from a man.? WTF! FTR-- By no means, do I condone violence of any kind towards women. Moms and Pops reared me better than that and I do have a rep. to uphold. Dig that!

"The age of chivalry IS NOT DEAD! I refuse to accept it"! Its just been awhile since some women have witnessed or experienced it, first hand. Thus, why somayall' "ackfunny" when it does happen.

Do you really know what you want?*stop* *pause* Its been said that women want to, eventually, be put in their place, so to speak, and want the man to take charge, to a degree... Being the youngest and having some older sisters and brother-in-laws, I find this to be quite the contrary, but true in some sense.

To get to the point of the matter and skip the "fourplay" BS, after experiencing, reading and talking, then reading and talking somemo' w/ people, I've come to the following conclusion: (Part 1)

There is no such thing as a compatible couple(soul mates). All couples disagree about the same things: money, sex, kids, time, etc.. So, it's really about how you manage your differences. If their is "kimestry", then the whole courtship is about convincing yourself and others that you are compatible. But, really, you "create" compatibility. And then, eventually, maybe in 15 years or so , you will become "soul mates".

Copy That! Cheif 257-139er...... (Part 2)...coming soon.

I need to vote, vent, write...etc.

2004-11-02T11:16:00.000-06:00

....Once again, I'z was running late, yesterday, for the second shift in a row. Not the way to start out or make a first impression @ a new base, especially when your the "new guy". However, it helps when you have some rank (and you know the deputy cheif who's from your previous base) and experience to fall back on. Got a LOC, letter of counseling, for it, which, after 6mos. gets thrown out. No big deal. "Its All Relative",........

Why was I late?

I haven't the slightest clue. No excuses. This 0655am Rollcall is not what its about, though, especially on the weekends, too?!?; its killing me.(use to: 0725a on weekdays and 830 on weekends, makes sense, right?) In getting older, " I'z need ma sleep!"......I know. Go to bed earlier. Easier said than done until I move off base.

....Still waiting on word of my comp. account log-on. Hopefully, should have a flightline license by next week so I can actually do my job title of driver/operator. They have me schedule to be a driver/operator tomorrow, but we'll see if it pans out or not. "Technically, you're not suppose to drive without a flightline license, but we all know how the gov't "redtape" works.

Its hard trying to keep motivated in a career field that's totally the opposite of what you want to do.....and when it comes to getting things done here, it seems like pulling teeth. I need to talk to that career advisor, quick.... Having patience is key in times like these. I use to have loads of it. But for some reason, as of late, its no where to be found.

Don't really feel like being an leader/example, just yet or better yet, setting it, either..... Ok, I'm done venting....

One week and a day @Tyndall

2004-10-25T16:07:00.000-05:00

Ok, really. I'm not goin' keep you updated on the daily, but when I've been here for about a month or so. I'll holla back atcha, copy that....

I know for a fact that life would really suck if there were no God nor music. Whether you choose to believe in god or not is your business; whatever floats your boat. I know, for a fact, that I'm nothing without him and being the person that I am, presently, to this day, if there were no music, me, myself and about 3/4 of the population wouldn't function the same and eventually, die.

Think about how music makes you feel..... when you hear or first heard Marvin, Jeffrey, James Ingram or Heatwave(now I'm showing my age) come on.....Flashbacks, I know......

As long as I have good muzak of any kind, I'm good to go. Or atleast, I appear to be. Music is therapeutic. 'Specially when your bored like I am now. And even if I had money to spend, I wouldn't because I have just the right amount of music to sustain me until the rest of my things arrive from overseas, if its not here, already. By the way, John Legend is the second coming of Carl Thomas, if there is a such... However, I'll let you be the judge. Its my opinion only.....buts its "minez".

Part 2

If there were no God, I'd have lost hope awhile back because of simply nothing/no one to believe in. That's where the "faith" part comes into play. Funny how we have those, who don't believe in Him, then, when they get in dire straits or life threatening situations, who's the first person or name they holla out for? "Oh God or Jesus Christ",...... just a lil' somethin' to make ya say,........"hmmm?!?"

Without Him and Music, would it even be worth it at all?

One.

Day 5 of Arrival at Tyndall AFB

2004-10-21T13:23:00.000-05:00

....I know. What happened on the first four days.... Not much, really. I'll explain..

....Currently on my third and last day of my break for "Group B". I know, I 'm getting days off already and haven't even started working...... We have rotating days off now, as opposed to "set" days off. Got a P.O. Box now, so I can get my mail. Also went to finance and got a clearer understanding of why they failed to pay me last pay period. So, I'm due money, yeah. A lot. Punk Gov't suther muckers'.......

Transition from overseas back to the states can be tedious enough as it is, let alone, when dealing with the gov't(AF). God is still good.... Chatted with Ms. Parker last night. She has become a good friend, especially when you need a women's point of view besides moms'.

By the way, did I mention how much that "Change" is overrated, mos. def.!?!

So, how do I like Panama City, so far? Well, its no Chicago, no Germany either, however, but the weather is great. Area is good-looking with the beaches and all. (I know, people would kill, literally, to be where I am, right now.)Found a good church, too, already. Always a priority. The mall is decent; your typical "mall" shops/stores. Once I move into the comm., I'll be able to get a true sense, hopefully. The base itself is bigger than my last but somewhat slower. Being stateside, one would expect to have the common store items here on base as well. But they were out. "What the piss'?"........It'll get better.

They have four fire stations versus two from previous base. The main station is good. Dispatch center is kinda behind in comp. w/ Spangdahlem's "state of the art" dispatch center. Apparently, they have reached their budget for the year. So, getting gear, uniforms, etc. and a locker is questionable for now. The Training supervisor seems to be a real good guy and my super. seems ok for now..... Probably won't actually start working til' next month.

Rest and Recoupe or Resentment?

2004-10-04T17:13:00.000-05:00

IT FEELs GOOD to BE BACK HOME IN CHICAGO, AND I SAY THAT WITH ALL SINCERETY. HAVING BEEN IN GERMANY FOR 2 YEARS VIA THE AIR FORCE; OUT OF THOSE 2 YEARS, 6MO. IN KUWAIT AND JUST RECENTLY 3MO. IN IRAQ, SO I’VE BEEN ENJOYING SOME WELL DESERVED R & R, ETC.

HAVING TRAVELed ABIT AND TALKING W/ MANY DIFFERENT PEOPLE, LOTS OF QUESTIONS COME UP and ARE THROWN @ YOU WHEN THEY FIND OUT THAT YOUR MILITARY, IN PARTICular, THE AIR FORCE. ONE? IN GENERAL STUCK OUT W/ WITH ME, ASKING WHETHER OR NOT BEING IN IRAQ HAD CHANGED ME IN ANY WAY? MY RESPONSE TO THE ? WAS “NO, NOT REALLY” BECAUSE PRIOR TO OUR GETTING DEPLOYED, AS A MAN, I KNEW WHO I WAS AND WHOSE I WAS, BEFORE EVEN LEAVING. AND WITH CURRENT ACTIVITIES THAT WHERE HAPPENIN' @ OUR HOME BASE, GETTING AWAY FOR AWHILE WAS ACTUALLY THERAPEUTIC, AND ReALLY, I WANTED TO GO. SO, NATURALLY, SOME WERE LIKE” YOU WANTED TO GO AWAY AND GET SHOT”? “THAT’S CRAZY/NONSENSE TALK. WHO WANTS TO GET BULLETS, ROCKETS AND MORTARS SHOT AT THEM. YOU CAN GET SHOT AT RIGHT HERE AT HOME.” TRUE. YET, I WAS NEVER IN FEAR OF GETTING INJURED AND EVEN POSSIBLY DYING.

SO, I TELL YOU ALL OF THAT TO SAY THIS: In the (emotional) three weeks and a half that I’ve been home, I’ve learned more about myself than I could have ever learned in the desert of Iraq.

Two most important things that I’ve learned about myself:

I, now, hate the movie “Love Jones” w/ a passion…….. it feels as though I’ve been living out the movie, these past three weeks. Seriously, its one of my favs. next to "Brown Sugar".
I have a short-term memory; not a selective memory. Thus having to write down important things that I should remember.

In closing, to those of us who are single, in relationships, dating, separated, no longer married, whatever, when you discover something about the other person that differs from your perspective of how things should be or doesn’t vibe with your standards and its bothering you a deal,

Talk to them and tell them wants on your mind and if its something that can be eventually worked out or dealt with, then deal with it; don’t run away from that friend or person saying, “I do think it’ll work out cause I’m just different”and let that difference be the “x” factor because we all have our standards and differences, whether you like it or not. Unless its something thats just unworkable because we are human and thus, you have to charge it to their heads and not there hearts and forgive because somebody bigger than you and I forgives us daily. At the end of the day, when its all said and done, it’s what we do from the heart that’ll be judged.

My tongue's tide.....God, can you still hear me?

2004-09-24T14:23:00.000-05:00

Its sad that I, like others, express myself much better on paper than I can when in the midst of a person(s) and that I need notes for even the simplest yet deepest of thoughts.

Here I sit for the longest of airtime doing what I vowed never to do: "sweat a women".
With approximately One weekend and a half left on a much deserved leave/vacation, paid, if I may add, and non-chargeable.

With time being of the essence, and understanding individaul situatuions, yet I still want more. Is she purposely putting up blockers until I leave and/or merely being "polite" towards my feelings. If so, why? I'm a big boy, I think I can take it. Or can I? If the chemistry isn't there, then, its not there. Consequently, I do know that spending the remainder of my last time here, with her is questionable, atleast........well, that's what I'd do if somebody I was feeling was in town only for a limited time. Maybe the feelings aren't as mutual as I thought. I do know that words mean nothing when accompanied by contradictive action.

Maybe I'm trippin. Taking it too serious to even begin with.(Already, have I called more than enough times, which is so not my MO, and not said what I wanted to say) Yeah. You women do that to us, now and again. Or maybe I'm like the little child and have found a rare gem and just may not want to lose it.

To any avail, for me and others, its not about appearance at all. . .appearance is minor, but perhaps, yes, chemistry. You have to feel something when she walks into the room and vice versa, I want for her to ache when I leave. . .without that, all you have is a good friend, which is what I have already, fortunately.

Dude!.....is that soul food I smell cookin'?

"My City" By Malik Yusef, The Wordsmyth

2004-08-16T01:59:00.000-05:00

This the city of Chicago, The state of confusion. The style I'm using is
free.
Or at least it would be if my mind was. Peep, I'm behind cause I
didn't handle
my function while in high school. Although I was cool. The
hood I live in
ain't that proper; Cause a cop a stop ya, And have you at a
hundred and
eleventh before you can say "not guilty". I'm not filthy,Nor am
I rich, Ain't
that a bitch. Like life is, Not your wife is. See, thats
your better halve. Do
your math. And peep that two halves make a whole.
And all I have to hold Is my
self pride. So these streets I strive
Like a Black Panther....Asking can the
situation get much worst. All
I do is try to appeal to the masses, As the
phrase "keep it real" passes.
The teeth of too many phoney individuals. Snakes,
that smooth like
criminals. They create chemicals, That the Earth hate; Doing
their
damndest to decrease my birth rate. I'd settle for lesser knowing I'm
worth
wait.... Or at least my weight in precious gems. So I'm steadily, steadly,
steadly, Trying to lose my religion, like R. E. M . Created in His own image
so are we him? And through all this crisis, (Shit) I wonder where
Christ is!? Well he damn sure ain't in K town or the wild hundreds, Where
they broadcast G.D. till the world blow-up And Stone run it. Hunted by
their
police for display in stateville cages; Come out to make minimum wages
And with a disease that are contagious, It is fucking outrageous. The
amounts of Blacks and Browns they lock up. But the Most High encourages me to
put the glock up And Stock up on do for self knowledge. A brother
couldn't afford to go to college, So I had to learn form the school of hard
knocks On the hard blocks of the Chi'. Even I, think about moving out to
River Oaks, As my liver soaks, In mad Hennesy; Cause I got a bad
tendency
To do a lot of drinking. Now, I do a lot of thinking.
Blinking, was your third
eye, When you heard I, was one of the chosen
one... Industry doors keep closing;
(sing)" Watch the closing doors"
Niggas want a record deal But can they deal
with a record? Cause
once they get rich They tend to switch Like a sissy.
Please, miss me
With all that bullshit you popping. This knowledge I'm gonna
keep
dropping. Even if you had one of them red octagon..... Motherfuckers say
"Malik,
how you make your living?", I say by breathing oxygen.

Re-birth of the cool. . .

2004-08-14T22:38:00.000-05:00

.....its been a long time, I shouldn't have left you.... Guten Tag fellow Bloggers, authors, writers, poets, wordsmyths, and builders alike. Whether black or white, young or old, educated or streetwise, attached or detached, living life fully or just living a lie.... "Its All Relative, but Its Not Negative". Wanted to commend you who've tapped into the unknown and dare to bare your souls and more or less, printed your personal diaries for others to reflect upon. Wanna give a special TY to "soul rendezvous" for the inspiration or better yet resurrection.....wanted to do it right and not do it just to be" doing It". When you know better, you should do better. Copy that, Cheif.....

God!!!.....This German weather is the worst!!!!!

2004-08-13T04:04:00.000-05:00

As I awake the last morning of my three day break @0800, I go to gaze out the window and bask at the gorgoues view of country hills and forest or better yet, let me walk outside....As I approach the foyer, I sense the smell of liquid in the air.....raindrops begin to fall, making rhythms of open drumrolls...once again, summer raindrops fall. As I return inside to start laundry the rhythm stops. Soon, at about an hour later, the sun is playing peek-a-boo, deciding whether or not to grace us with its presence.....about two and a half hours later, once again....Summer raindrops fall.....hard this time. I feel as though I'm living out Carl Thomas' lyrics....... one hour to the lader, the sun comes out breifly....Now, we are in a neutral state of mind as I come to the realization and remember that, yeah, God does have a since of humor......

T-minus ..22 days....and counting!!!.....

2004-08-10T09:00:00.000-05:00

....sittin' here gazin' out my window overlooking the small German village trainstation. My, how beautiful the country forest hills are. ...... just wondering when I'll be back to the country once separated by the Berlin wall. Yet, can't wait to leave here either. Or is it the people that I work with that I can't wait to depart from.... to any avail, two years gone by , my how time flies ........ Yes, 22 days and 11 more working shifts left before another chpater is complete in Bobby's World.....